Nov 10, 2016

No Fuss

Something I feel strongly about:

I don't believe in or respect complaining. I'm a big believer in toughing it out.  I sometimes feel that I'd make a good Englishman. I love the whole stiff upper lip and gallows humor approach to the trials of life.

This conviction that one doesn't whine or complain comes out in a number of ways.  Here are three:

I don't like to gripe about my aches and pains when I'm not feeling well, and I tend to be impatient when others do so.  I think I could work on my empathy in this regard.

I don't like to fuss over food. I generally eat whatever is put before me without complaint, even if I don't love it.  And when I go out to eat I rarely send food back or complain that's cold or under or overcooked.  My approach tends to be you git what you git and you don't throw a fit.  Even in a restaurant where presumably I should have it my way.

I feel strongly that other people don't owe me anything.  I don't demand "customer service",  I don't feel that others need to make special acknowledgement of me or my feelings or what I'm going through. Which is not to say that I feel I or my feelings or experience don't matter. I just don't think they matter more than anyone else's feelings or experiences. I strongly believe that most people are doing the best they can under the circumstances.  I believe that people can only be who they are.

I feel that my no-fuss, low-maintenance approach to life is good most of the time. But I also know that sometimes I should complain and I don't.  My conviction about no griping can bleed over into an avoidance of conflict and an aversion to making other people uncomfortable. There are times when the right thing to do is to complain--loudly, to protest.  And unfortunately at those moments I find often prefer to stand down rather than stand up.  That's when my dislike for complaining becomes a liability rather than an asset.  The Bible says there is a time for everything, and I suppose that means that there is a time to grin and bear out, but also  a time to cry out and complain.  My goal is to have the wisdom and the courage to know the what the moment calls for, and act accordingly.

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