Angry: What's Behind a Word

 

No, it's not what we're doing. Nobody gets to issue this pass. Not even your black friend.

What's up my ni. . . .

Yeah. You're not supposed to say that. Especially if you're white.  Why is that, you may wonder?  Why is it that an insult like "Karen" is considered "funny", but the N word can only be referred to by it's first letter? How come "cracker" and "honky" don't seem to be "as bad" as racial slurs towards black people? And why do black people "get" to use the word but no one else can?  That doesn't seem fair (though as an aside I've always felt it a bit strange that anyone would feel that someone "gets" to use the word, like it's some sort of black privilege).  Isn't hateful language, hateful language no matter who says it or who they say it about?

Yes, and no.  Yes, hateful language is never okay. If you are a decent person, a Christian, then hurling insults at one another is never acceptable. But no, unlike, human beings, not all hateful language is created equal. 

Here's the thing:  Black people aren't so precious and sensitive that we can't deal with racial hatred from a particular ignorant individual. As has been made abundantly clear in these Angry posts the struggle for civil rights in this country has never been primarily about getting people not to hate. It's always been about creating a more just system that treats everyone fairly, regardless of color. If we can achieve that goal, then let the haters hate, and we'll carry on.  The problem with the N word and other racial slurs directed towards black people isn't so much the hate in the word, but the power--and the danger--that word represents. 

Let's take another slur that sounds innocent on its face, but serves the same purpose. Boy.  As in "Hey, boy, you better watch yourself. Don't get uppity." or "Boy, bring me that hammer."  This slur like the N word is designed not just to insult, but to remind the person of their "place" in society. It is also a warning of what can happen to you if you forget that place. It's the power behind those words, the power to act with impunity on black people that makes my stomach churn when I hear it. The epithet yelled at you out the window of a passing car could potentially mean imminent violence--violence that is all the more likely to occur because the perpetrators know they likely won't be held accountable for what they do. On the other hand take your typical insults slung at white folk--"whitey, cracker, honkey, Karen. ." whatever. None of those words carry the weight of a society behind them that can make you suffer if it so chooses. Granted, in the worst case scenario, if you're surrounded by an angry crowd when you hear those words you might be in for a beating.  But those words suggest nothing about your "appropriate" place in society or the level of concern society has for you if you do get attacked. Racial slurs against people of color--especially, black people do.

Obviously when black people use these words among themselves they no longer carry that weight.  That said there is no agreement at all among black people that this word is "allowed."  There many black people who feel that the word should never be used, not by other black folk, not by anyone.  And then there are those for whom everything is nigga this and nigga that.  I myself never use the word; I don't even go for the less volatile, "Negro, please." But I understand those that do use it and when I hear the N word from the mouths of fellow black people I don't have that gut reaction of anxiety that I do when others use it. 

In the final analysis, it's what's behind the word--a racist system that for generations has worked to keep black people in their "place", by violence if necessary, even more than the word itself, that is most offensive.