92: The One in the End (And The Beginning)

 

And then we were at the end.  The end of our senior year.  The end of high school.  The end of childhood.  And the beginning of so much more. It was truly a bittersweet moment.

The graduation weekend events began on Thursday, May 14, 1992 with the year-end class party at Chandra Maloney's lakeside home.  I wrote:

"Fairly good day.  Tonight was the senior class party  at Chandra's house. It wasn't all that exciting but I had fun. . .Didn't do much else other than a War Pig strike with Joey [Gravell].  We snuck out in the middle of the party and 'shoe-shined' a bunch of people's cars. I had to do mine to avoid suspicion.  It was so hilarious. Everyone was talking about it. . ."

Later that night the War Pig had other plans for mischief--which did not pan out:

"12:38 AM. Actually Friday morning waiting to do a War Pig strike.  I'm getting really tired, but I'll survive. Mark Reams was supposed to spend the night but as yet, he hasn't shown up and I doubt he will. We kind of missed connections. Too bad, he really wanted this one."

Ah what a difference cell phones would have made. Or maybe not. Perhaps Mark realized it was time to put away childish pranks. Or more likely he was still working on that epic speech for Saturday night.

Friday, May 15 was the first event of graduation weekend, the consecration service.  I reflected on the evening in my journal:

"It's finally beginning to sink in. It didn't' really begin to hit home until J and I were strolling down that runway tonight in our black robes and hats, and our yellow honor cords.  Only then did I realize that my high school years are really just about over.  It's kind of weird and I still haven't fully accepted that it's me that's graduating.  Tonight was the first program of graduation weekend, the Friday night vespers.  It went well, and we got out amazingly early. We were done by about 9.  I walked down with J and tomorrow I will be walking down with Chandra."

The walking down thing was a big deal. At least for me. I put a lot of thought into who I wanted to walk with for the Friday and Sabbath morning ceremonies. I wanted to walk with people who meant something to me.  Of course, there were more than two people that meant something to me, but in the end I chose to walk with two people who I first befriended when we were all freshmen, who became my best friends then--and continue to be to this day.

J and me, Friday night, May 15, 1992

Chandra and me, Sabbath morning, May 16, 1992

Saturday, May 16, 1992 was The Big Day.  I took some time a little less than an hour before we headed over to the gym for the commencement to try to reflect on the momentous occasion:

"6:18 PM   Well, its finally here and I feel like I should have something profound to say and I don't.  In leas than two hours I will be marching down that aisle for the last time.  In less than five hours I will be a graduate of Forest Lake Academy.  My high school days will be over, a significant milestone will have been passed and a phase of my life will be ended.  It seems like I should be reflecting on these past four years but I can't seem to find any words.  I, maybe,  should be looking to the future, but for me the future is dark and uncertain; I hate to think about it. And yet it seems so close, I can hardly help it. . ."

Several hours later I picked up again, finding ample time to write amidst the "excitement" of Project Graduation. 

"Well, it's over. I am now officially alumni of Forest Lake Academy, a graduate and once again a freshman. It was an awesome ceremony from start to finish.  Admittedly, I am biased but to me it was the most awesome graduation I'd ever been to. It's really weird and kind of sad to think that there is no next year, no next semester, no Monday for academy. It's all over now, a piece of history now.  It was such a high though being on that stage, it was a high that lasted until first dull hours of project grad.

I got to the school around 7:15 or so and spend most of the time talking to my friends and glorying in the approaching moment.  Numerous pictures were taken etc. . .Finally a little after eight, we marched down the aisle. 

The ceremony was so awesome. Chandra played that piece that inspired me so much and she was sooo good. Rey gave a really awesome speech.  Linda  played and was also quite impressive.  Then they had the officers speeches, which were all very moving.  Ly, Chris , Jennifer [Everett], and Susan all broke down in the middle of theirs. For once, I felt satisfied with a speech I made and I think my friends were quite surprised to find themselves tributed in my speech.  

To see Sabbath morning baccalaureate marches (in and out) as well as the early parts of the commencement program including Rey's speech, parts of Chandra and Linda's performances, and snippets of the officers speeches  click on the link below (or copy and paste it into your browser):

http://share.imemories.com/pubshare/75da9543-e4f5-431a-ac6a-76dbbeaa5ae6

Mark was the last one and it was incredible, it was one of the best speeches I've ever heard.  I  say this especially because I know how hard it was for Mark to write that speech, he was so worried about it, he said it'd only be five minutes long but he worked hard and it paid off. It was the perfect length and had the perfect balance of humor and seriousness. It was so funny, he started out by taking pictures of the audience, the class, and himself.  It was a great speech.  After that we presented the class gift and then they had the principal's and college awards etc.  Chris was valedictorian, Jenny B [Burrill] was salutatorian, Matthew was Student of the Year, and Rey got the principal's award.  I collected two more scholarships, one from Oakwood and from Southern.  Finally we got our diplomas.  Then the class song and it was all over. . .I went home and changed, went to Chris C's house, and then to project grad which up to this point proved very, very dull."

To hear Mark's speech and segments of the later part of graduation, click on the link below (or copy and paste it into your browser).

http://share.imemories.com/pubshare/dafd4822-a13b-4628-979f-4102b317fbe2

Looking back at the video I don't think it's accurate to describe Chris Cotta's momentary "huskiness" of voice as "breaking down" in the middle of his speech. Not that there would be any shame in it, if he had.  

Mark seemed to have a prescient understanding of the importance of documenting the moment.  In those pre-social media times, his selfie and audience pics seemed so creative and original.  Little did we know that in 30 years this would be standard.  

I do not remember the class song.  Did we actually sing it? 

My criticism of Project Graduation was a bit harsh. I know the sponsors worked hard to provide a fun celebration for the graduates.  I don't think there's much more they could have done that didn't involve loud music and grown-up drinks.  As it was, we did have about a minute of loud rock n' roll before they shut us down.  I recapped the night on Monday, May 18, beginning with my assessment that Chris and Carissa had the right idea:

"My first days out of academy have been rather dull.  Project grad was kind of precursor to that.  Chris and Carissa had the right idea when they left at 2:00 AM, an hour after it started.  It was so damn boring, the most boring five hours of my life. I did win two tickets to Sea World and so did Chandra and J.  We're gonna get a group together and go. . .

The only interesting thing to happen was when they had "Funky Boy" Rey's band play. It consisted of Rey, Jason Lassell, Matt Crofton, Dale [Robertson], and Nathan Jones.  That was cool, but they were asked to cut it short because they were 'playing too loud', so they did one mellow song, then Eric Mullins took over drums from Dale and they went out guns blazing.  They kicked into a full volume, kick-ass, and damn good rendition of Metallica's 'Enter Sandman' and it was awesome. It was the best thing they played all night. It actually sounded like the real thing.  And Colin [Astwood], Mark Reams, Shane [Hamilton], Steward Eden, Tom McDonald, and a bunch of other guys started moshing.  Needless to say, this did NOT last very long. The sponsors quickly made them stop, much to everyone's disappointment and they played only a minute, maybe less.  After that it was back to 'pool games starting downstairs everyone. . .' As Jason [Lassell] said, 'Rock n' Roll is better than drinking & driving.' Particularly on grad night.

At the end of the project grad they had this great cry-fest manufactured by PT. I thought thing was really stupid and contrived, but everyone cried anyway.  I think it was because we were all so tired. I cried but for different reasons. . .

Yeah, sure. For different reasons.  Whatever.  I've been on the other side of that event for 24 years, trying to plan fun and meaningful events for cynical, too-cool-for-school teens who don't see how these old boomers can possibly "get it."  I may have felt our sponsors were "manipulating" us into an emotional moment.  But the fact was, the emotions were real.  And looking back, if I could have truly understood what I had been trying to articulate earlier in my journal--and if I could have known what the years ahead would bring--the passage of time and the distant miles, the growing apart and growing close again, the heartache and celebrations. If I could have known that for one of my best friends, the clock was ticking with 28 years left.  I think I would have appreciated those five hours so much more.  I'd gladly take those five hours back thirty years later from 2 AM to 7 AM tonight and happily spend them with the people who were in that rec center that night. One thing I'd change though. I'd let Rey and Co finish "Enter Sandman."  I'm really curious to see who would have taken on James Hetfield's roaring vocals.

So it ended. 

And so it began.

"And in the end
The love you take
Is equal to the love you make"

                                  --The Beatles, "The End"

The One Year Bible: "The Crime of Counting"

Don't do it David!

I've identified three major errors David made in his life.  The first, and perhaps the most famous, was his dalliance with Bathsheba and the murder of Uriah to cover it up. The second was his failure to manage his children.  We first suspect this is an issue with his failure to address his son, Amnon's rape of his daughter Tamar. The Bible later confirms his lax parenting when it states in regards to his son Adonijah, that "his father, King David, had never disciplined him at any time, even by asking him, 'Why are you doing that?'" (1 Kings 1:6).  It's counterintuitive,  but as often happens with spoiled kids, David's permissiveness emboldened Adonijah to rebel. Adonijah would end up leading  an attempt to take the throne that David had designated to Solomon.

The third error came in the twilight of David's reign, when he decided to conduct a census of Israel. I found this story difficult.  For starters, there's the statement 1 Samuel 24 that "the anger of the Lord burned against Israel, and he caused David to harm them by taking a census."  The first issue is that it appears the Lord caused David to do wrong and harm his people.  Granted in the version of the story told in 1 Chronicles 21, it says "Satan rose up against Israel and caused David to take a census of the people of Israel."  That creates a new question though.  Who really incited David to take the census?  God or Satan?  Naturally theologians over the years have come up with varying answers to that question.  For me, I think the difference in the two accounts could illustrate how the understanding of Bible writers changed over time. Perhaps the author of 2 Samuel didn't have a concept of an Adversary to God, and so attributed everything to God.  And maybe the author of 1 Chronicles had more refined understanding that allowed for a Satan to attack as well as God.  I can't say for sure--but what does seem clear to me is that just because a Bible writer said God did something--especially if it's "out of character"--doesn't necessarily mean He did it.

Another question is, what wrong did Israel do to deserve the punishment that came as a result of David's census?  Again, while 2 Samuel suggests God was angry with Israel and so caused David to conduct the census, 1 Chronicles simply states that Satan rose up against Israel and does not imply that Israel had done wrong.  David himself later describes Israel as "innocent as sheep" and claims full responsibility for the sin in ordering the census.  The fact that the nation suffered as result of David's mistake is consistent with the sad reality that often times it's the innocents who suffer when leaders do wrong.

Finally, I wondered why the census was wrong in the first place.  While once again many theologians have weighed in on this, the Bible gives no indication of why it was wrong.  But it is very clear that it was wrong. No less than Joab urged David not to conduct the census.  While he doesn't spell it out, Joab implies that to conduct the census implies a lack of trust in God: "May the Lord increase the number of His people a hundred times over" he says in the Chronicles' version, "But why, my lord the  king, do you want to do this? Are they not all your servants? Why must you cause Israel to sin?"  Listen, when Joab, a man not exactly renowned for his high moral standards, tells you you are doing wrong, you are really doing wrong.

But David begins the census anyway, and disaster befalls Israel as result.  David is given a choice between three punishments--a three year famine, a three month war, or three days of plague.  David opts for the plague, reasoning that it's always safer to be at the mercy of God's wrath than at the mercy of human beings.  While we might be inclined to question God's goodness in this story, David had no doubt about the heart of God.  He understood, as Rich Mullins sang, that "there's a wideness in God's mercy that I cannot find in my own."  For those of us reading this story thousands of years later, who maybe are scared to trust God fully, this story is perplexing.  But David, who lived it, who saw 70,000 of his people perish, knew God so well, that even in this desperate moment understood that God was still to be trusted.

Highlights of 2 Samuel 19:31-2 Samuel 24, Selections from 1 Chronicles, and the Psalms

• The Census

• Adonijah Tries to Take the Throne

• David's Twilight Years and Death

Fun Facts

• Do you know about the time David couldn't kill the giant?  While David was able to slay Goliath as a boy, in his later years, he was not as successful.  In his face-off with the Philistine giant Ishbi-benob, the king had to be rescued by one of his men (2 Samuel 21:16-17).  After that David's men insisted that his days of fighting giants were over.  When the battles against the Philistines and their warriors continued it was a guy named Elhanan that took out Goliath's lesser known brother.

• Do you know how you got on the praise and worship team at the Temple David commissioned? Music was a a major part of the worship at the new temple, and significant number of Levites were assigned the role of "praise team."  What's interesting is that there was no interview process or resumes needed to determine which musician would get which job.  Jobs were assigned by means of "sacred lots, without regard to whether they were young or old, teacher or student."  Basically, you got your assignment based on the roll of holy dice.

• Do you know how David kept the chill off in his old age?  Some old folks wrap up in a shawl or a comfy sweater, maybe a hot water bottle or an electric blanket.  But David being king and all got himself a human warmer.  Abishag is described  in 1 Kings 1: 1-4, as a beautiful young woman, who was hired to care for the king. Among her duties was to snuggle up with the elderly king in bed and keep him warm.  The Bible made it clear that there was no sex going on.  Just spooning, I guess.

• Did you know that David does not forget?  Man, in his last years as David was getting ready to hand over the throne to Solomon, he settled some scores.  After giving the usual admonitions to follow God and whatnot, David says "And there's something else..."(1 Kings 2:5-9).  "You know what Joab did to me."  David had taken note of Joab's murder of Abner, and more recently of Amasa, another one of David's commanders.  He instructed Solomon to make sure Joab, who lived by the sword died the same way.  David also had a little something for Shimei, the man who cursed David when he was on the run from his son Absalom. Shimei thought he was off the hook, but David, in true mob boss style says to Solomon "You are wise man and you will know how to arrange a bloody death for him."  Dang.  Dang!  David is not playing!  I think this was more than Mafia style vengeance.  David knew who would be a threat to his son's throne (after all, Joab had sided with Adonijah against Solomon) and wanted to be sure that Solomon took action preemptively against those threats.  Joab remains a fascinating character to me--a Biblical antihero if you will, a Batman-like figure who lived by his own coldly calculated code of justice. He was a loose cannon, a maverick who did what he thought was right regardless of his boss, who he undoubtedly viewed as a bit soft. In the end, David would let Joab know he chose the wrong one.

• Did you know who else does not play?  Bathsheba! After being somewhat of a cipher throughout the whole Uriah/David entanglement, she comes strong on the scene in David's final days to advocate for her son Solomon's place on the "Iron Throne" of Israel.  She is a major player in the quelling of Adonijah's attempted coup.

Psalms that Stood Out to Me

The final readings from this week moved fully into the Psalms, where I expect we'll spend the next couple weeks.  I thought I'd share a pair of Psalms that stood out for different reasons.

Psalms 8.  The book of Psalms is basically a book of song lyrics.  Each of the passages was a song. Most--but not all--were written by David.  Unsurprisingly, many of these lyrics have been put to new music by modern composers.  As I come across some of these Psalms, I'll share the songs that have been made out of them. Psalms 8 is the first of these, I'll share.  There are a couple of tunes to the eighth Psalm.  The first is Sandi Patti's high energy interpretation of vs 1, the first part.  And then there's one I just stumbled onto in church today. I was working in the sound booth when the praise team busted out this take on Psalms 8.  I have to admit it was pretty good, and we had "church" for a good 15 minutes on that song. But my personal favorite is a few years older. It's by Keith Green, one of the "Jesus Music" pioneers.  I could write a whole blog on Keith Green, who had a huge impact on my spiritual formation. You can read more about how here. For now, I'll just say that if you can get used to his distinctive voice, which I concede is an acquired taste, his interpretation of Psalm 8 is really quite nice. And unlike Sandi, he sang the whole Psalm!

Psalm 18. I don't have a song for this one, but I was struck by a theme that we'll see quite a bit in the Psalms--and elsewhere in Scripture:  God's might and power.  I think we tend to be a bit scared by God's power.  We prefer nice friendly Jesus, rather than a God with smoke pouring from his nostrils and fierce flames leaping from his mouth (Psalm 18:8).  But what David does is paint this awesome picture of God and then says, this God is my protector. That is how he reconciles a fearsome God with a God he trusts.  This is a God strong enough to reach down from heaven and rescue us, to draw us out of deep waters (vs 16) and in whose strength we can crush an army and scale any wall (vs. 29).  David reminds us that a God powerful enough to be enough in any circumstance is by necessity going to be a force to be reckoned with.